Monthly Archives: December 2014
Life throws curve balls. And when it does, one does what one does, by default. The same action over and over.
One cannot say how one will react, although many will try to tell you that they know, until one is in the middle of it all.
That has been the story of my life. People telling me how I should react, how I could react, and most importantly how they would react if they were in my shoes.
And truth be told, there is no right answer how to respond to any situation, just how you do will tell you a lot about you. And hear me when I tell you, none of it is wrong. It simply is your life.
So on November 25,2014 when I was told I had Breast Cancer, surrounded by my daughter and my husband, all I could think of was,”They have come a long way with this, no problem.”
And then a little reality hits when you start talking about it. When you start to study it. When you start to notice the changes in your body.
And when people react with,”Oh my God,are you okay,” or they burst into tears, you begin to think that perhaps there is more to it.
And the reactions are also not wrong.
I remember one person texting me to say she was sorry I had breast cancer, could I come to her event. Others simply do not know what to say.
So what does one do or say for that matter.
“Heard about your health challenges, anything I can do to support you?” is a great start. Or “sending lots of positive thoughts to you and your family,” is another great way to handle it.
Anything else is really all about you when the person is really conserving energy to be all about healing themselves.
Reality hits eventually and when it does, I reacted the way I would always react.
I went to work. I booked my December full so that I can deal with other’s concerns and not mine.
I told people what was going on, talked about it openly, and then went to work as if I was having a root canal.
My emotions most of the time were positive. Two days I would feel sorry for myself wondering if my life had just been shortened by a lot or if I was going to beat this.
And then the day before the operation, I began to question what was really happening. I did the right things, eating healthy, taking a IV injection of Vitamin C, resting, hypnosis, meditation, and exercise to keep me calm and relaxed.
Monday night I went to meditation class and it was awesome.
Tuesday morning, I got a surprise when I saw my Dad there, I was not expecting that. And then we went into the hospital.
To remove cancer from my body.
My dad, my husband, my brother, my daughter all in Pre Op waiting for me to walk into the OR.
Laughing, joking, having so much fun that the nurses told us that we were having too much fun which I understand is unusual. But then they had not met my family.
You see my family had been through this a few times. My brothers trial, my brothers whole incarceration, my brothers brain tumour, my other brothers eye surgery and now my tumour. In all of these things we laugh, we have fun. we make light of those things that could potentially harm. And we do it together, at least the ones who choose to be there.
Random Acts of Kindness was an act that was done without expectation of return or without agenda. When we give with the pure heart we are giving with no expectation of return. Including my name in lights or on a large cheque being handed to the organizer, a thank you card, a recognition of any kind, and anonymously. When I have done this in the past, it felt wonderful. Even that is an expectation, the expectation of feeling wonderful. How to do a Random Act of Kindness.
- Spontaneity works well since no thought is involved. Less time for the ego to get wrapped around it.
- Give what you feel is right
- Do not tell anyone
- Have a lot of fun doing it
- Give from the energy of love, pure love.
Some examples of pure giving
- Buy coffee for the person in the drive thru behind you
- Buy someone’s groceries
- Open the door with a smile for someone-women-open the door for the gentleman and smile sweetly at him.
- Send loving energy to everyone around you
- Walk around with a smile on your face
- Feed the homeless
- Support a family anonymously at Christmas
- Trust yourself to give
- Learn to receive from others with grace.
- Smile with your family, leave the drama alone for the holidays.
- Do not judge your friends and family
Giving with a pure heart means there is nothing for you to be gained. No business, no recognition, no nothing. When you do this, you allow the gift to be received without the attachments of you around it so it can be enjoyed to the fullest. Buying flowers or cards with a positive note on them and just putting them peoples windshields or putting the flowers or food on the doorstep are just a few examples. Merry Christmas!