Posts Categorised: 2016
Anxiety is a real energy zapper. And anxiety is real.
And as much work I have done on myself, as much as I have helped with this issue, there are times when I am reminded what it feels like to be anxious.
My visit to the Breast Health Center today was one of anxiety and ended joyfully.
It was bundled tissue. No abnormalities.
So what does that mean?
That I am healthy and the anxiety I was feeling was for nothing or was it?
As anxiety has become one of the most common reasons people visit the doctor, one really must look at it for what it is.
Anxiety is the not knowing, the fear of what might happen, the fear of expecting a bad result.
It is the fight response. When pushed into a corner, what is your default.
For me, my default is to go into control, to manage, to overwork. I go into do-ing. For others they may go into sleeping, others in anger and so many other responses.
None of these are bad, it is simply something to notice and to enjoy the feeling of whatever you are experiencing.
Do I waste energy on something that will never happen?
Do I play the what if game?
Do I expect the worst and then when the good happens, I am relieved?
Do I ignore it?
Do I embrace it?
Do I yell and scream and ask why?
The only time these become bad, is when you spend one year doing them.
Handling anxiety is possible but it takes some work and some know how.
Not handling anxiety creates more problems than what you really want to deal with in this lifetime so handling it while it is in the beginning is optimum.
7 Steps on how to deal with Anxiety
1. Exercise-30 minutes of physical activity every day will help your mood. Without it, you are not tired, you are not burning off the excess energy you have.
2. Meditate daily-5 minutes of meditation daily will slow your mind down long enough to breathe and to allow your body and mind to make decisions that make sense.
3. Sleep-Adequate sleep is so important. 7-8 hours of sleep is critical to allowing your body and mind to put things back where they are meant to be.
4. Handle events as they come up. Procrastination allows for things undone that nag you at the back of your mind. Handle things with urgency.
5. Clear any upsets you have. If you have an argument or disagreement, do not leave it. Handle it.
6. Forgive. You do not need to hold onto grudges. As Tim McGraw says in his song, “Bitterness keeps you from flying.” Not forgiving keeps you from enjoying life to the fullest.
7. Get the information you need. Do not wait to get the info, go get it. Do what you can to deal with your situation.
Have you ever looked at someone else and think that they have everything? That their life is perfect and so lucky in life?
And why is your life such a mess or not as good as that person?
Why do you get to struggle?
Why is your marriage over when they look so happy?
Why do they have financial success and you do not?
The comparison card is such a slippery slope to travel when your self esteem is not at its highest.
Here are few tips on how to combat the I am not good enough program that everyone seems to have at one point in their life.
1. Be grateful for what you have. You are probably in a different place than you were a year ago and you will be in a different place in a year from now.
2. Understand that everything is a cycle. And you are in the cycle that you are in as the people you envy are also in a cycle.
3. We all will have a challenge to overcome in this lifetime that will support us in not doing everything by ourselves. At one point in your life you will need support from someone else and you will be given an opportunity to give support as well.
4. This lifetime is all about balance. As prosperous as one is, there will be a time of void as well. One cannot have one without the other.
5. Be okay with your lot in life. Trying to change something you cannot change is stupidity. “God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.” Is one of the most powerful verses I have ever read and applied in my life. There are some things that positive thinking will not change such as my height or the disease I just got diagnosed with. I can change how I deal with it.
6. When you find yourself in envy, send love to the person you are envious over. They have what you want which shows you it is possible. Thank them for showing you that these things are possible.
And above all else, understand that you are enough in this lifetime and that you have come here to do something. And you will. It will not look like anyone else and it should not for you are you and they are them. And it is enough to be who you are.
Funny how I see things differently as I go through life.
At one time, a coach purse was the thing to have, a nice house, a great car and diamond jewellery for every day of the week.
What I know today is that although some of those things are nice, I got them because someone else had them and I felt a little pressure to be like them.
Those people are long gone. Those people are still trying to get others to amass debt to be part of the crowd. But they are not my crowd.
I live this life. I used to be so good at figuring how to make do with things I had, to be grateful for the things I had. Now I find it much too easy to simply go and buy something new.
So I am doing a thirty day challenge of using what I have, or being aware of what I have and what I do not use in the next 30 days will be donated.
I want to be aware of what I am doing not reacting because of one thing or another. I really want to experience everything that I choose to experience.
I do not want to live this life afraid to say one thing because is might be taken the wrong way or say something that might be hurtful and not even know it.
And I do think having stuff makes me a slave to more stuff. And worse what you think of me having stuff or not having stuff makes me a slave to you.
In light of what has happened to people all around the world with fires and flood where they have lost everything, it seems that if we shared what we had, everyone would have enough.
My ability to see what is possible, to expand my mind, my spirit, my soul, my way of thinking, my emotional depth, and above all else, my spiritual connection not just with God but with everyone around me.
Everything that has happened so far has led you to a possibility that there is a possibility.
And most miss the fact that there is even that hope of a possibility.
Until they are challenged, until they have something to get righteous about, until something goes wrong.
It is so interesting when I think of all the courses I have taken in my lifetime to attain the PhD status, or even the personal development courses I have spent over 100 grand on. And for some time I questioned whether it was even worth it.
And now I know the answer to that. Yes it was.
Here is what I mean.
The courses I have taken have all provided me with an education that is unique to me. And all of them have allowed me to open up to the possibility for me.
I was asked about a seminar company that I was affiliated with for 6 years. Even I had problems with my saying I worked there for I looked at the leaders of the company and some did not even come close to resemble what they preached about and I could not understand why that bothered me. It bothered me because I was in judgment. I was looking for the leaders to show their true colours, which I was sure was opposite to what they talked about.
I did not yet understand that their job was not to be in integrity by my standards, their job was to teach me that the possibility of integrity was available. Their job was to show me that wealth was a possibility. Their job was to open me up to see, not them, but me, the possibility of me.
And all I could do at the time was judge them. I now know different. Their integrity or lack of integrity is not my judgment to own, it is theirs.
And so did the church. The church where I grew up was rife with all kinds of problems and judgments. And I left when the judgment of me was hurtful and personal. But their job was to simply open me up to the possibility, the possbility of me.
Taking T. Harv Eker’s course was about a set of rules that I needed to follow to be a successful trainer. What I left with was the possibility of even being one.
Recently I hired a coach/mentor. He was the first person who said I could bring my company to 1.3 million by December 2018. He opened me to the possibility of even doing that. That is a great mentor. He did not even know much about my business. What he did know is that if I could accept the possibility, I could accept the reality.
Many people will talk the good talk, but when it comes to actions, it is usually a different story.
What is possible for you? And everything is not the answer. You have a specific skill set unique to you that has led you to the possibilty, what is possible for you.
If you are still saying, I cannot do this or that, or I wish I had more money or time, spending a lot of time with businesses that only make others rich, or avoiding your life, then the your have limited the possible.
Take one step into the possible. Just one!